Brazzos Tacks

(E________ first draft: 4,300 words.)

Into the wide blue yonder

I do not have time to watch anywhere near as much TV as I would like. I have, however, made some for Hulu’s Only Murders in the Building, a “cozy” comedy-mystery set in a New York apartment building. Apart from episode six (a hot mess saved only by the actors), it’s a funny, beautifully written show wrapped around a genuinely intriguing mystery. Episode eight dropped yesterday. I’m already jonesing for nine!

One of the three main characters in Only Murders is played by Steve Martin. His character, Charles Haden-Savage, is a past-his-prime actor who was the eponymous star of a 90s police show called Brazzos. A show so successful that his catchphrase, “This sends the investigation into a whole new direction!” is still remembered 30 years later.

Of course, one of the reasons I can’t watch as much TV as I would like is that I have now started on the first draft of E________. As readers of this blog will know, I have already outlined the novel, so “all” I have to do is write it! E________, unlike Braking Day, has two protagonists, the first of which, EK, has now appeared on the page.

And has completely messed with me.

When I drafted the outline, I had a very clear idea of what EK was going to be like. When he arrived, however, he was a great deal cruder and significantly more intelligent than I originally envisaged. Put another way, he is a completely different character, which means that his reactions to the situations in which he finds himself is not what I thought they would be, which means the scenes don’t go the way I thought they would, which means, of course, that the outline is not going to win prizes as a roadmap.

But that’s OK. Roadmaps are boring. Outlines should be more like nautical charts, preferably old ones, with coastlines marked “terra incognita,” or “here be dragons.” When you drive, you have to go where the road makes you go. But when you sail you have to wander. There’s no other way to do it. There are currents and contrary winds, storms and unnerving calms. You can never keep a straight course: to go north you tack north west, then north east, then north west again as wind and current dictate. You can sail past islands you never intended to visit, see the mountains of an undiscovered continent loom suddenly on the horizon, fill up on water at the mouth of an unknown river.

But if the map is true, you will still get where you’re going. EK has taken E________ “into a whole new direction.” But it’s a thrilling one, and if we have to sail a different tack to accommodate it, so be it. When we finally drop anchor at our destination, the chart we used to get there will be filled with exciting new details: “terra cognita” and “no, really, I mean it: there were actual dragons.”

Let out the mainsail. Time to see what’s out there!